Tomorrow morning I will have been 6 weeks without a cigarette, but as recently as last night I had a craving for a smoke. It came on while Tessa and I were in the Ponsonby International food hall.
think there were a number of things behind this craving hitting. Having
two blog postings censored on Quit-line had stressed me and being a bit
bored and having my increasing stress at dinner not noticed by Tessa
helped increase the gravity of the situation. Suddenly there it was. It was strong and it was difficult to shake but I got Tessa to drive me
home. As soon as I was away from sources of temptation I could work on
dispatching it from my life; this time.
would have probably posted something about it on quit-line, but having
had two postings censored there yesterday. I really didn't feel like
talking about it there. I was shaken but not out. The rest of the evening wasn't very pleasant but I got through it; which is in itself a lesson.
I got to
bed, a little late, and slept without any problems. Today at work I
wasn't having any nicotine cravings. Obviously while it helped a lot in
the early days, I think my recovery has advanced to the stage where I
don't benefit greatly from the quit-line board. It is consuming a lot
of my time and it's probably time I started to wean myself from it.
On the subject of my censored postings, I did point out to them by email that I didn't feel that they should have been censored. I received an email from them today where they did concede the main point I made in my second posting; but I feel it was too little too late.
That brings up my big problem with Quit-line. This blog posting is about a problem with my giving up, so it should belong on Quit-line, but because my annoyance with Quit-line either I couldn't tell the real story or if I did tell the real story they would immediately censor it.
I have this blog. I think it's time that I started using it and just putting my story here.